Happiness is a Choice
You may have heard at some point that happiness is a choice. But there may come a time in your life where it feels next to impossible to feel happy. I will say the month of January was not my happiest month even though I had many things to be happy about. I designed my website and started my blog. Everything is going pretty well at my job and I have my health, so what could be bringing me down?
The thing is I have been dealing with so many inner demons that it was draining me physically and emotionally. I would find myself going through the motions of pretending to be happy so others would not think anything was wrong. I would do everything I could to keep a smile on my face while deep down I was trying my hardest not to let the tears fall down my face.
A big part of my unhappiness stemmed from my own thinking and behavior about certain things. Even while I was writing my bucket list for this year, I was thinking of all the bad things that could hinder me from accomplishing these goals. After awhile, I just let the feeling take over and tried my hardest to get through the day the best that I could.
Towards the end of January, I was tired of feeling this way and I needed to figure out a way to break out of this emotional rut. Even though I was feeling this way, I knew it was possible to feel happier. Everyday I began to find little ways to boost my happiness and I thought this would be a good post to share with others who may be going through the same thing.
Ten Tips for Breaking Away from Unhappiness
- Find reasons to be grateful. Be grateful for the little things. Be grateful for the little things. Always remember that there is someone somewhere is wishing they had the things that you have. It sounds very cliche, but it is the truth.
- Do something you enjoy. Take time to do something that will make you happy. What you have to remember is it is not selfish to focus on yourself. You can’t help someone else if you are not taken care of. Your first priority should always be you.
- Write it down. I have gotten into the habit of taking a journal with me everywhere. I use it to write down my feelings. Writing is a great way to get your feelings out. Sometimes you may not want to discuss your feelings with anyone at the moment. Writing can be your outlet. Also, don’t just write about the bad; write about some of the good things as well. That will force you to think positively about yourself and can remind you that things are not as bad as you think.
- Don’t fight it. Don’t bottle up your feelings. This was one of my main issues. I always held my feelings in which in turn brought me down even more. Don’t fight your feelings. The more you bottle up your emotions, the more pain you will feel. You have to accept that you are not in the right state of mind at the moment. Understand that it will not last forever. One thing that I kept telling myself was “This period will pass.”
- Get away from negative self talk. Anytime something would go wrong, I always blamed myself. I was so hard on myself that I started to believe that I deserved the bad things that would happen to me. That is wrong way to think. The best way that I dealt with this was acknowledge my negative thoughts, but I wouldn’t allow myself to believe them. Every negative thought I had, I countered it with two positive thoughts. Do not take your negative thoughts seriously when you are feeling down.
- You can’t give up. You may want to hide from the world until this period passes. It is completely understandable. I know. I have gone through it. The big thing you have to remember is to hang in there. This feeling will not last. You were happy before and you can get there again. You just can’t give up.
- Get out of the house. Being secluded in the house with your thoughts can make things worse. I know it may be hard to find the energy or motivation to get out of bed. But I can say just going outside for a walk around corner or up the street will make a difference. I would take my dog for long walks while listening to some upbeat music. I would come back home with a positive shift in my mood.
- Look at online blogs & support groups. It sounds weird, but it does help. There is comfort in knowing that you are not the only person who feels this way. There are people all over the world who struggle with the same unhappy feelings you are. Being able to read what others are going through and how they are overcoming their struggles will also help you. It also helps to offer some helpful advice as well.
- Stop relying on others for your happiness. I am very guilty of doing this. I sometimes find myself searching for acceptance within others. You can not let other people have an affect on your happiness. Your happiness should come from your achievements and the countless adventures you decide to embark on. By allowing others to control your happiness, you will eventually get hurt. Don’t allow people to have that kind of control over you.
- Talk to someone. Anyone. It doesn’t necessarily have to be family or friends. There are 24 hour phone numbers that you can call or text to discuss your issues. There is no reason you have to deal with these feelings alone. TEXT 741-741 if you don ‘t want to talk about it on over the phone.
Have you ever gone through a period of unhappiness? What are some ways that you dealt with it?